Lionel Monologue

         I remember that day clear as a bell. I missed my father so much and just wanted to be with him. My father seemed to be disliked by everyone but myself. Even though my mother seems to put it lightly, she did not enjoy him and Sandra did not like him one bit. Although she did not know it at the time, I overheard her call my dad “a big sloppy kike.” Running down to the dinghy seemed like the only option, the only way I could escape at the time. They never understood why I ran away and that was a good thing. Even though the distances were short, it felt as though I was on the other side of the world. And then my mom came to the dinghy. I was upset that she came to talk to me and even more upset that she was calling herself an Admiral. Dad had told me that she was a lady and nothing but. My mom wanted me to open up to her, explain why I was running away but I didn’t. I then flipped the goggles into water not knowing that they belonged to Uncle Seymour and not caring once I found out. I wanted her to throw her key chain into the water; I wanted everything to be thrown into the water, to start fresh. I cried because the emotion was too much. I told my mom what Sandra had said, not revealing that I had known what it was. She lied to me, told me it was a kite and bit my ear. I did not know it at the time but my mom was being sexual with her son especially by putting her hand down my trousers. I do not know what encouraged my mom to do it but the only thing I could focus on was seeing my father.

            After that day, I did not runaway again. Not because I had a better relationship with my mom but rather because what innocence I had was gone and then I grew up. Ever since that day I have been looking at her different.